Had one of the most horrible nightmares ever, one that felt like it was going on forever (just like anyone who reads this will feel about this post, pardon me,) and of course the best part was that it felt like it was really happening to me.
The earliest parts of it are a blur, but here's what I remember of the worst parts:
Me and the kids (my lil sis, and my neices and nephew) were at some sort of commerical center. It felt like some part of the older Manila, like Malate or something. There was something about my shoes coming off my feet somewhere along the stroll, then the bunch of us trying to retrieve them. For some reason, it seemed that a number of shoes had come off other people's feet too. So it took us a while to get one of the pair back, and somehow, the other pair just could not be found. We carried on anyway, there was what seemed like a coffee shop. My mom was there too. Now, the kids had wanted something to munch on, and decided they wanted donuts at one of the stalls we'd just passed. So, we went back there, and as we were picking out our flavors, it turned out that there were dogs there. Big ones. There we were trying to evade the snapping of their teeth, and I found myself jumping up high that I was practically up on the next floor of the center. When all that jumping about was over, we finally got our donuts. Taking bite after bite, I came to the conclusion that mine tasted much too funny. Anyway, we hit the (coffee) shop from earlier in the scene, and met up with my mom.
There was this person there, a man, who looked completely unusual. He had specs on, but it wasn't his outside appearance that made me feel the way I did about him more than the fact that it was as if I could see his evil thoughts. I'm sure someone somewhere has given me that look before, but this one was just really messed up. And it wasn't the perverted type either. He wasn't just undressing me in his head, or anything along those lines. This man was up to something bigger, like he'd seen this something happen to me in his mind before, and was finally about to see it happen to me again in the flesh. A much more realistic re-enactment of a fucked up scheme he'd played time and time again in his dreams.
After feeling strange and naked about his gaze, he hopped on some bike looking thing, which I hadn't noticed there til he got on it. And as he pedalled, it turned out to be hauling something that was large enough to carry what, five? Six people? And it did. They unboarded their container and stood in front of me. There was not so gentle harrassment, which later on turned into a full on bullying scene. I felt like Simon in that one night scene on the beach in Lord Of The Flies, where he'd been crawling out of the jungle, starving, after his little encounter with the pig's head. To top it off, I felt like this bunch really wouldn't stop til I was dead.
Somehow though, all the poking at me ended in a swift blur. But there were a few other characters that stepped in, and I remember this one particular guy whom I ended up exchanging mobile numbers with. Now, that part I can chuckle about. It's a shame though, because right now I can't recall his name, which I used a number of times, in one or two layers. It turned out he'd helped me get out of the bullying scene and all. Anyway...
Me and everyone else got into this van. I was supposedly safe already, and so were the rest of us. I recall something about a kitten being carried by one of the kids, and something about how, later on, it turned out that there were two. Somewhere in the layers there was a chase that the two kittens were involved in, along with one of the dogs from the donut place. Still, that much was blurry as well.
On the road again, but in a different vehicle, and riding shotgun this time, it was like we were headed for some mall. The driver of what I assumed was a cab somehow managed to vanish from the driver's seat at one of the stoplights, right when this person started tapping at the driver's side window (I can't tell what the person needed, and whether it was a he, or a she, or a kid, or grown-up) and it was there that I had to take control of the wheel. I was amazed when I got the car to come to a stop without hitting the car in front, or kicking the foot brake. Then swoosh, this female I know from around here was in-charge of the wheel. And she was doing a lousy job of it too.
When we were at the turn-in at the mall, she was going up the sidewalks! And the next part I remember was meeting up with the guy who had helped me out earlier on. Turns out we were both smokers, so we took it outside and smoked cigarettes. This time, it felt like I was in Hong Kong.
The wind was really strong, and as the first cigarette I'd managed to light up flew out of my fingers and hit the ground, I noticed how wet the ground was. Had it rained? Because I sure hadn't noticed. Anyway, I took out my second stick, and that flew out too. This time though, there were two policemen at my back, and apparently I was in trouble. For littering. I begged the cops to just left me off, and that it was just that the wind was so strong, and that I really didn't mean for those sticks to be on the ground. But now, as I looked around me looking for ways to plead my case, the kids were there with me, and they became part of my reasoning out with the policeman. Somehow, I managed to get off the hook.
Next stop was at some slightly posh place. A small bunch of people and I were walking about a covered walkway, and though I hadn't a clue what it was we were looking for, we kept going anyway. Later on, I found that we were at some hotel with a lobby that was a little too little for a lobby. I was the one who stepped up to the receptionist to find out the rates and such. As I approached the desk, I noticed a messy pile of papers on the ground, scattered under the feet of the other people who were standing there. I figured out that those were the prices and all, but I just couldn't be bothered to excuse myself before stooping down to pick a copy. The strange part was that, when I spoke to the lady, I didn't sound like me. I had french accent on, and no matter how I'd shake it off, it wouldn't. Now, this lady couldn't seem to understand me when I'd asked for a listing of room rates. It took us a while, and our tempers were rising too. Just as I was on the verge of flicking her cheek, my accent came back to normal, while she started acting up on me like a real bitch. She'd gotten out from behind her desk and now we were practically head to head, she was about my height, 'cept she had heels on. There was lots of taunting going on, but that somehow died out and soon we were talking about how tall we were. Quite frankly, we resembled lesbians talking dirty to one another after having just met. During all this, in came a bunch of, what's the word for 'em? Alpha males and females? I don't know. Just think: stunningly busty beautiful girls, with deliciously fit and good-looking men. They could have all been brazilian for all I care. I'll need a better term than "alpha females" for the girls, because they were the essence of bonehead, I swear. Unless bonehead is alpha at all. Anyway, me and the receptionist, we ended up deciding to have a chit chat over cigarettes soon as she went on break. We weren't really up to something, were we? Fade out.
There I was in my hotel room as someone walked into the room. My first love. I was ecstatic to see him, and he seemed to be feeling similarly. All my true emotions were so spot on here! See, here's a person I love so so very much, regardless of the fact that this love hasn't had me produce one of the world's most romantic songs or poems. The person whom I felt a "love like that" for for the first time ever, among many other firsts. And finally I got to see him, and I felt so bloody complete!
I stood up, we hugged. We kissed. We gazed into each others eyes, we spoke pure honey. Soon enough, we got to the cuddle part, which is usually and without surprise, my favorite part. There we were, smiling as we looked into each other's eyes, sitting in bed. His left arm wrapped around me as I rested on his chest while my left hand was touching his face. I could just live in that moment forever and ever. Before you know it, he was feeling me through my knickers, and I didn't mind at all. If there's anyone who is allowed to work my bits any day, it would have to be, without a doubt, this man. And of course, things gradually started to happen to me, and soon enough my knickers remembered they had some better place they had to be. Just as things were "going the way I liked them to", the door opened. In came a familiar face. Wasn't this the nice guy I was supposedly smoking cigarettes with at the mall? What the...
Now, my love wouldn't stop what he was doing, no. He didn't even jump at the sight of the guy. Instead, he casually looked at the guy as he made his way into the room, and sat himself down as if to comfortably keep watch. I asked my love to stop, he just wouldn't. His hold on me became, as with his fondling, harder and loveless.
The guy got up from his seat, and slowly walked towards us. I tried to fight my way out of the position I was in, which was completely exposed; with my back against my love's frontside as he held me by both my arms with just his one arm, as his other arm was forcibly fiddling me.
Screaming now, I demanded some sort of explanation, from either one of them. And sure enough they spoke, but they sure weren't talking to me.
(What?! These two know each other?! What the hell is it that worked perfectly?!)
Heavens, no. Please! This can't really be happening...
The guy had propped himself up on me and had already whipped his stuff out, and no matter how I fought, my love just wouldn't let me go. And the I more I fought, the stronger my love's grip grew, and the more the guy struggled to get in but couldn't. It didn't take long until one of the bonehead babes from the lobby stepped in the room too - gorgeous tan on her great body, smug look on her beautiful face. Great, just great.
What in the world was going on? Who the hell is she?
And why is she smiling like that at my love?
They were all in on something alright. It was like every absurd and awful thing I could imagine at that time was actually taking place. Just as I beg no, everything else nods yes. A damned frame-up of sorts, from the dogs at the donut place, to the man with the gang, even down to the cops and even the receptionist! All that, a fucking set-up.
Now, in the real bedroom where I lay, my breathing was getting too difficult, and thanks to that, I snapped out of the dream. And as I did, I felt my heart had left its cage and dug up a grave, and lay there in it shivering.
No. My love never could and never would do such a thing. Fuck no.
